Day 140: The stress is making me angry and my anger is all geared in the wrong direction. I realized today that I don't really cry in front of the babies anymore but I've replaced it with a short fuse. I have to change this.
If my husband gets this new position at work -- he's had an interview everyday this week and two tomorrow -- he will be working first shift some of the time. That alone would make my day a lot easier but...if he doesn't get it I still have to figure out how to instill more patience within myself. I have done a good job of creating a routine for us and sticking to it helps everyone but I still need to work on enjoying it all. Having a 3 year old, 2 year old, and a 5 month old means that I am SO blessed. So, so, so blessed. What did I do to deserve such a privilege? God has been so good to me and I want to bathe in the blessing that He has given me.
I need some sort of outlet as well but I have no idea what. I am consumed with life right now without much time to squeeze anything else in.
225 days. I think it's time for a break.
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